A Heart For Mentoring

I had a mentor/friend in my late teens and early twenties, who walked alongside me through life and encouraged me in my walk with the Lord.  I loved to spend time with her with no real agenda - we didn't formally study the Bible or anything like that.  We just talked and shared life and spoke naturally of the Lord, and how His Word was impacting our lives.  She was older than me by about 10 years, was married and had children.  She was busy, but I've never forgotten her heart for ME, and how she made time weekly for us to get together.

I've gone on to follow this pattern, with teenagers, or young moms, and my own children - my daughters especially.  A group especially on my heart are home educating moms.  They have taken on a task to not only educate their children, and if they are wise, to disciple their children.

I write for our state home education magazine put out by the Coalition of Homeschoolers Across Pennsylvania (CHAP).  This quarter I wrote about mentoring and its importance, and I thought I'd share it here with you.  I've written it for homeschool moms but it can apply to all of us as women to come alongside younger women to encourage them.

                     A Challenge For Experienced Homeschool Moms                    

I recently became a part of an online homeschool moms group. I’m not sure why I requested to 

join, since I don’t normally do these kinds of things. I have a lot of homeschool experience (I’ve 

been home educating my children for nearly 23 years), and I am comfortable in the way we 

homeschool. I guess you could say that I am confident in my choices. I also belong to a really 

great co-op that has worked hard at encouraging one another being key!

Imagine my great surprise then, when first day, first thing I read is ‘here is a your chance to post 

a rant.”  Wow!  There were many comments and all of them rather ugly. I get that 

once in a while we need a listening ear to express frustration. However I am certain that a public 

forum is not the place for this to happen. Once words leave your mouth, or you hit send on your 

keyboard, you cannot get them back.

My heart was grieved as I read some of the things these women said about their kids, 

husbands, in laws. I KNOW I don’t know their situations, or their frustrations, but that is kind of 

my point. In these days where we all can post our ‘opinions’ about every little thing, I was sad to 

see it playing out on an online homeschool forum. Would I really want my mom to post publicly 

that I had been really annoying and a bother to her for the whole world to read? I can tell you 

the answer is NO, and I know that my kids would feel the same way.

I began to wonder if these women had any help in their day to day lives, from friends or 

extended family. I wondered if anyone had a mentor, someone who’d been through the trenches 

of parenting and home educating. I have a heart for mentoring women, especially 

homeschooling moms, but I wonder sometimes if many home educators, when they finish with 

their last child, ‘retire’ so to speak. Do any stick around home educating circles to be that voice 

of encouragement, or that shoulder to cry on? 

I will be done with my last child in about six years. My plan is to stay involved with homeschool 

parents, to continue to be a part of a moms group. May I encourage you to do the same, Moms?  

We know we don’t know everything, but our years of experience count, and just wanting to 

encourage and cheerlead these younger moms on is of great value!

These women in the online group needed someone in their real life to say, “I know, I

understand, it will be okay.” They need someone to be their cheerleader, to remind them that 

it is a hard job somedays, but it is of eternal value, because your children are made in the image

of God and are of great worth to Him. The need know there is someone who will listen, and

care.  Frankly, some moms need to know that they will get through these hard days and see

fruit. It will happen!

My deep concern for the things I read that day, are that these moms are building resentment 

toward their children. They need to be reminded to seek God for the answers to our loving 

challenging children. He made them and knows them, and knows what they need.

Can I challenge you moms who are nearing the end of your homeschool days, to look around 

you at the young moms just starting or those who have kids getting a bit older, and walk along 

side them? They need you whether they know it or not.

Let’s remember to pray for homeschooling moms. Pray that they will follow God in the path He 

has for them. That they will love their children, that their husbands will encourage them in their 

work as moms and teachers in the home, and that their children will be a delight to them. Let’s 

also ask God to give us a mom to mentor and encourage.  It will make all the difference in the 

success of their homeschools.

Friendship: A Bit of Tea and Conversation

Monday the five of us popped out for a bit of tea and conversation. Alicia is my nephew's wife.  She is a dear girl, a homeschooling mama, and a friend.

 Is it just me or is Sarah getting entirely too grown up?  I think she should stop it right now!

 I am so blessed by my friendships.  I am thankful to be a part of these young women's lives.

 I wish someone had mentioned my wind blown hair!  Oh, my.  So typical though.  I am happy to have this photo, in spite of my hair!

 My sweet Mama and I went off plan and enjoyed dessert with the girls.  We all chose these...

It was a great time.

Taking Time To Nurture Relationships

I was going to title this post "I've Been Playing" but the one I used sounds a lot more 'spiritual' doesn't it? (grin)

I had been in a rut of being at the mercy of a schedule, not of my own making.  My days consisted of driving people to work and picking them up all at different times, usually the last pick up is between 9:45pm and 11:00pm.  In between I was squeezing in school work with the kids, and cooking and trying to keep the house clean.  Oh, and yeah, I run a business, too.  Can you say crazy exhausted?

So on Monday I just had to get out of the house!  We did school work and then Rachel, Emily and I went shopping with my Mom.  It was so much fun!

Tuesday, a friend from church and I took our kids on a field trip to a historical society.  It was small but nice with a special section on the Civil War, an area focused on art, rooms set up to show blanket chests, quilts, stitcheries from the past and a great collection of Grandfather clocks.  In the basement were transportation things: a trolley, sled, carriages, early cars...and around the corner was a room that was set up for hands on learning!  The kids loved it! 

 It was such a blessing to spend the afternoon with this dear friend and chat and encourage one another.  Many of the families in our church are an hour away from each other, which is why we spend all day on Sundays together.  But it is fun to get together one on one.

Then last night I had the chance to meet up with a friend for coffee and dessert! (I told you I was playing these days!)  It was such a blessing to slow down and talk...we spent four hours together and could have gone on!  

I am so thankful that the Lord heard my prayers for encouragement and a break from my often hectic schedule.  I am thankful for my husband who said "Yes, go.  I want you to!"  Tim, I love you! And I am thankful for the friends God has given me.  Precious women whose hearts desire to walk with God!

We need to take the time to nurture the friendships God gives us, whether they are with our children (what a blessing!) our parents (special) or with sisters in Christ.  Each one is of great value and worth.