Hospitality, Friendship, Encouragement

Tuesday, May 1, 2007

Difficult Children

I used to think that if I did all the right "Christian" things in raising my children, teaching them the Truth, teach the gospel to them, homeschool, etc...that I would get a guaranteed certain outcome.

I found it is not true.

You see our children have an enemy of their souls, who wants to destroy them, and waits for the opportunity to make inroads in their lives. Our children can make choices to hold bitterness and anger and let it take root. They can decide to try the enemy's ways.

This brings such a sadness and pain to the family. But you cannot talk them out of it when they get to be of an age to decide certain things for themselves. They can choose to go against everything they used to believe and know as truth.

This does not mean that God is not Truth, or that He cannot intervine in their lives. I am not saying that the enemy is more powerful than God.

I believe God has a plan for each of our lives. Psalm 139:16 says " And in Your book they all were written, The days fashioned for me, When as yet there were none of them." God has purpose for each persons life. He is the one who draws us to Himself.

I have come to realize that our children making right choices and walking with Him is the Grace of God. I pray that my difficult child will come back to the Truth, that this child will have a deep satisfying walk with the Lord, and that God's purposes will be revealed and done!

If you have a difficult child know that you are not alone. There are many out there. The enemy wants to destroy all that God loves. He is at work trying to do this. This is difficult for the whole family because all are affected by the difficult child. Here are my suggestions.

1. Pray continually!

2. Realize that no amount of trying to convince your child of the Truth will do it. I always thought that if I said just the right thing, that would make them see the error of their way. I have learned that I do need to speak the Truth, but then leave it to the Holy Spirit.
His job is to convict of unrighteousness.

3. Find someone to share with. God wants us to help and encourage each other.

4. Don't let it tear your whole family apart. Keep your relationship with your husband strong, and try to focus on your other children. Often, the difficult child gets lots of attention and the other kids have to do with less of you. Don't let this happen. The difficult child sometimes feeds on the focus being on them.

I am thankful that in so many ways, our relationship is strong with our difficult child. I think this is due to God's Grace. However their are choices being made, behaviors being practiced, that are not profitable to our child or to the family.

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